


Pristine

by spitfuckiero



Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 15:34:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6526015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spitfuckiero/pseuds/spitfuckiero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I swear I can remember him yesterday</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pristine

Ryan was sat on his usual spot, on a wooden chair beside an open window that welcomes the fresh warmth of the morning sun. His back was tense, worn out and wrinkled hands shaking slightly as he struggled to remember his name. He wanted to cry, because he felt so so useless and pathetic that he somehow managed to forget his name, the man he's been living with for almost five decades. His grip on the pen tightened, as he repeatedly writes the letter B on the thin paper, in hopes of finally recalling the name of his husband. 

"B-B..." 

Just then, the familiar warmth spread throughout his body as a pair of strong arms wrapped themselves around him. He smiled softly, and leaned against his touch. 

"It's Brendon, and you're..." Brendon trailed off, looking at his husband expectantly. Ryan suddenly froze, his lips quivering in a pathetic attempt to utter his own name. Fuck, he can't remember. He swear yesterday he still can, and yet- and yet...

"I-I can't-" Ryan choked out, his words barely coherent as sobs started erupting from his throat.  

"Hey, it's okay baby... It's Ryan, your name is George Ryan Ross the Third, and you hated the name George, so you always insist on being called Ryan. It's okay, it doesn't  matter- Ry, please, listen to me," Brendon knelt in front of the taller man, his hands cupping the face he have fallen in love with, and still loves just as much. Ryan looked up at him with tear stained cheeks, and it breaks Brendon's heart everytime. Everytime Ryan fails to carve his name on the wooden chair, everytime Ryan would ask Brendon if he already drove the kids to school-even though it has been twenty years since both girls parted ways with them, and everytime he sees Ryan like this. God, nothing hurts so much more than this. 

"I understand if-if you get sick of me and I'm sorry- I'm so s-sorry I can't even remember y-you I... I tried but I-" Brendon hugged him tighter, stroking the man's gray hair. 

"I'll remind you every single day, Ryan. And I will never get tired of it, the same way you never got tired of dealing with my shit in the past. I can't just let you go like this, you know. I'm going to spend the entire day every single day of my life, and every breath I take, telling you our story. I'm not going to get sick of you, not now,  not ever. I love you so much, please don't ever say that again."

And just like everyday, Ryan would smile, lips repeating nothing but the words I love you and kiss Brendon ever so gently, like a feather drifting on the wind, like how their most intimate kisses have always been. 

Brendon presses their noses together, and sneakily wrap his arms around Ryan's thin frame and lift him up, emitting a weak laugh and a delightful glint on Ryan's eyes, before carrying him to their bedroom where Brendon would spend the rest of the day telling him all the details he have forgotten from the past. There are those rare days though, when Ryan would wake up next to him and remember the name of the man he have loved since forever. And they will watch shitty movies, or read classic books, and life is just as good and simple. The way they both like it.

But for now, the only book that they will open is the one they've both read for more than a hundred times already, but it doesn't matter, because this book is both their favorite. Not only because it's beautiful, so real, and alive, but especially, because  it's  theirs. 

"It was the year 2002, and I first saw you watching the sun set at the edge of the cliff..."


End file.
